Massively Parallel Procrastination

An untitled post

So last night I got taken out by the folks at Netways.de.

I got told that we'd be going to see 'Punk Rock Karaoke.'
Somehow, I expected a bunch of 30 something 'I was punk once' types getting drunk and belting out clash tunes.

The room was um. maybe half the size of the Middle East upstairs. It was filled with punk kids from maybe 15 to 25. Lo and behold, it was Punks doing karaoke, not Karaoke of old punk tunes. The sound was _awful_. The PA was so underpowered and overdriven that it was the rare moment when it wasn't clipping. Kids would get up on stage and start screaming into the microphone. It was tons of fun, even if there'S no way in hell I was getting on that stage. A couple of the kids could sort of sing, but most didn't even really try. After about an hour, we headed out to a stylish basement club playing what was translated for me as 'Chill House.' Kind of a contrast. Pretty people sipping mixed drinks and occasionally venturing out onto the dance floor. At this point, it was probably 2:30 AM and I was dead tired. But we 'had to' go to one more club. This one turned out to be a tiny dance club in another basement, mostly playing dancy remixes of 60s and 70s tunes. . . And it turned out my friends knew the bartender. In fact, he used to work at one of their clients. And used to use RT there. At this point, I figured I should start mixing stimulants and depressants (always a good idea, you know), so I ordered a Vodka Red Bull. Except the bartender poured us shots of something. I'm pretty sure it was Jagermeister, but I don't actually know. Then our drinks arrived. The Red Bull did actually pick me up some, which is good, because otherwise I couldn't have actually stayed awake to answer the barrage of questoins I started to get from Nick about where in Europe I thought the girls were prettiest and what did I 'think of Nürnberg girls? Answer me honestly. I won't be offended. Just tell me the truth.' Nick and Julian had been smoking all night. Just then, Nick pulls out another cigarette and, rather than use his own lighter, runs over to a girl he's been eyeing and asks if he can bum a light. At this point, I decided I'd had enough to drink and it was getting to be time to go home. The bartender, however, decided we needed to do another shot with him. Vodka this time. I told Julian it was getting on to bedtime for me. Julian told this to Nick. Nick leaned over to tell the bartender....that we needed another round of Vodka Red Bull. I asked for a water. The bartender told me they didn't have any. And then got me one. I downed it in a single gulp. We toasted. I touched it to my lips. Nick drained 1/2 inch from his and ran out onto the dance floor. I took the opportunity to top up Nick's drink from my own. He comes back and we proceed to toast a few more times. (With me basically pretending to drink. I'm way too far gone to want to keep drinking.) I tell Julian 'ok. let's get out of here.' Julian tells Nick and nick pulls out a 50 euro note to pay the bartender. Before he hands it over, he raises it to his mouth and bites a chunk off the end.